Today is my 31st birthday. While I don’t particularly like birthdays, they are usually fairly positive days in my life. Some have been spent on holidays in magical places, many have been spent in isolation reflecting on life but almost all of them have been happy ones.

But this year is different. Since the year began, let’s see… I’ve been laid off from my job, I’ve started a company in partnership and exited the partnership in about three months, been in a lockdown due to a worldwide pandemic for over two months and now it has culminated on my birthday – both my parents have gone into surgery. My mom the kidney donor and my dad the kidney recipient.

To say that I was the same person at the beginning of the year and now would be an understatement. To say that the year has been tough will also be quite the understatement. 

There have been many days of intense emotional releases (aka ugly crying), many days of feeling like a victim, many days of anger, frustration and despair and some glimpses of joy. 

But as I sit today on my birthday, waiting to hear if my parents are okay in a hospital during a pandemic, I’m surrounded by a barrage of family members that have come together in support. They are ready to risk their own safety to be here for my parents and me.

The last few days were spent with both my parents being vulnerable with each other. Talking about life and death and the possibilities, a new depth in our relationship. 

I’m bombarded with messages of love, support and care from long lost friends, family and acquaintances.

I’m discovering new sides to myself. A strong, resilient and tireless side that wants to make this experience one of growth for myself and my parents.

This spiritual journey sparked by these events had led me to now run my own company built around shifting the collective consciousness starting from those closest to me. 

And I’m content. Among all this chaos and uncertainty, my heart is full.

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